Crying baby

why can't I be a child anymore?
i never want to grow up. but have been forced so.

I feel sick and have some headache.
I cannot tell it to anyone. I used to tell mom, made a call and she would tell me, "oh, poor baby. Go to see a doctor. It's harsh to suffer so."

I know what she would say and how she would say. It's like the old games, lovely secrets belongs to us only.
Of course I know what to do. Of course I can do so. I just love it. To know I am loved and cared. But no more. since Mom is suffered more than i do. I have to be strong, but i just want to run, run away. To someplace no one suffers.

whatever

I am still dreaming... at a dream without you.
I am still wishing... at the dimmest hope that I would never admit when sober.
Why? after so long, I thought I can get over you like all other things passing at my life.
But a mail, a mail with only one line insensible words is enough to move my heart.
Why do you remember it? Please take it as a friendly greeting, please.
Darling you become a symbol, a symbol that aches me now or then. Like a small bite at heart.

Why? 在這麼久之後，我以為我已經遺忘你，如同所有在我生命中逝去的事物。
但只要一封信，一封短短一行不帶任何感情的信就足以動搖我的心。
你居然記得阿…讓我冷靜的把它當作一個朋友的問候吧，不然我會傷得更深，不然建築的堡壘將會一夕瓦解。你居然沒有忘了我。
但，就這樣吧，就這樣吧，就這樣吧...